OH POOR TONY, so misjudged, so misunderstood, I simply had no idea, if only your article had come out sooner, then that decent, trustworthy and honourable man would have been spared all that unnecessary and horrid criticism. The poor lamb.

Thank goodness “it was impossible for you not to overhear” and you were able to simply listen in, to a no doubt top secret conversation [on what was presumably thought to be a secure line], between two heads of state planning what was described by the UN as an illegal war and the invasion of a sovereign state and out of the blue you feel we all need to know 2 days before the Chilcott Enquiry is to be published.  Yes ma’am your touchingly tender tear-jerking tale certainly straightens everything out for those of us left confused and under the wrong impression. I’m sure your “silently willing Blair to try again” made all the difference, thank you for that.  And really, thanks to  your valuable insight and moving exposé, there is really no longer any need for the Chilcott report to be published.

Your timely revelations are no doubt an immense source of comfort to the 1000000 or so dead Iraqis, the babies, the children, the families, the old, the infirm, the men and women, the mutilated, the maimed, the paralyzed, the dispossessed, the refugees, not forgetting those on our side, who perished and suffered in this gratuitous war in light of your enlightening disclosure.  Let us too remember those still dying to this day in Iraq, Syria, Libya, Yemen, Bahrain, Saudi Arabia, the rise of Islamic State and, last but not least, his unprincipled cajoling and PR tips for repulsive and corrupt dictators in the name of the sacred $. Mr B.liar should worry less about his epitaph and more about his legacy.

Equally I am sure that the dead feel a great sense of relief from your declaration, secure now in the knowledge that Tony had “cojones” and almost behaved in a moral and dignified manner. Luckily, that second resolution supporting trouble-making French President Monsieur Jacques Chirac didn’t have his big ‘cojones,’ or Iraq may have been turned to glass. Pass the French, I mean Freedom Fries love.

We are indeed lucky to have amongst us someone like you who “having experienced things so close up”, would be in a position to clear things up for us dimmer and shorter sighted lesser mortals.  Thankfully your great sensitivity and insight and, no doubt your great gift of feminine intuition and virtuous clairvoyance allowed you the clarity and perspicacity that meant you actually “sensed very strongly Blair’s astonishing self-belief as the ground was being laid.”  Truly touching.

Lets not ignore the fact he was fully aware there were NO WMDs [as stated in reports from Dr Kelly and the ‘no count” Hans Blix]. In possession of this information, he chose to manipulate it, with premeditated lies and calculated deceptions, he deliberately led us into an illegal war in flagrant contempt of the UN.

Will no one help sort out his epitaph properly?

Thank heavens that Blair, the bastion of honour, the pillar of decency, this man amongst men with the cleanest, the purist of souls with the celestial power that gave him all pervading sight and divine inspiration and the  omnipotent clarity to impose the death sentences on a million innocent people and destroy the fabric of a nation.

Your article is the literary equivalent to a Barbara Cartland novel without the dignity of a cover.  Its pathetically obvious timing, conspicuously aimed to coincide with the publishing of the Chilcott Report, is simply a brass-necked attempt to deflect some of the abuse and criticism that the report should level at him.  It brazenly aims to stir up some modicum of sentimental support and endow a loftiness of purpose to a murderous action and in so doing, to whitewash over the blood-stained hands of a tyrant.  You voice is that of a shill, a shill of the same low and translucent calibre as Blair was in turn a shill to the mental midget li’l ol’ Geeedubbbiya and his bestial cohorts in the trinity of evil, Cheney and Rumsfeld.  Have you no shame?

On one last but hugely important note, you never even disclosed whether or not you take short hand, the only remotely interesting point in your rancid stinking Farticle. Please never ever pick up a pen again.

Now Shut Up and Piss Off.

This letter is in response to the article in the Guardian by Sarah Helm found here.

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